It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
I think my guts just had a chinese fire drill
dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
I tried. Now my legs are bleeding and I cracked my head on the coffee table. Never taking your advice again.
Come get her ASAP. She's "people bowling," which is just her rolling into random groups of people. People look pissed.
Sober now. I'm really glad I didn't try to make out with that guy who has a pregnant fiance
I can measure my amount of vomit in solo cups.
Have a glass of wine with dinner they said. Your hydrocodone has worn off they said... NOPE
ON A SIMILAR NOTE MY DICK SIZE PSYCHIC SKILLS ARE SO GOOD
I'm just checking to make sure you don't want to go to the farmers market... This is an assumption based on the fact that you were slapped with a sandwich last night and you remained unconscious.
Now that I've quit blow, I think I'm allergic to my cat....
I don't get it. Why have babies when you can have vodka?
He put your tit in his mouth. Professionalism is out the window after that.
okay valid
the D I S R E S P E C T of sending someone nudes, them opening it, and not bothering to respond
It's weird having sex with someone you actually like
Randomize
