no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
what do 4 police cars, 1 ambulence, and 2 fire truycks have in common?.... My driveway
woke up to an unread text message i sent to myself: "brreakfdast..pork and ice cream."
Soup is not an acceptable meal before doing that many Jager bombs
I was pissed last night bc this girl didn't want to have sex but offered to reimburse me for the condoms. That just made me upset
Legitimate concern. Who am I going to have birthday sex with?
YOU STOLE THE WEDDING CAKE?!?!
Only one tier
Tastes like cardboard anyway
Last time he went to Europe, every time he started drinking he would wake up in a different country with no memory. There is no way he can be tour leader.
You forgot your "boyfriend" from last night on my couch. You're suppose to bring that shit with you.
After a roaring rendition of Jay-Z's "99 Problems but a bitch ain't one" I ended up making her cry on her birthday.
With 4 extra seconds dedicated to the dong.
These kind of text worry me.
Showing girls my stab wound was not the brilliant idea I thought it was.
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
Okay, the good news, found Jared, all IDs accounted for, Jack is meeting us at yours with your requested the delivery. The bad news: Lost Alice, banned from Stages, possibly fucked my TA in the bathroom.
So I woke and tried to get up. Then I realised my foot was stuck in the pocket of the pool table.
Randomize
