I think I died a long time ago.
when your hometown is famous for abortion clinic bombings, hurricanes, and jude law's newest bastard, its probably time to move.
Buying beer for freshmen. No matter what they ask for, I'm getting them Colt 45.
how am i supposed to spank it to a shakira video when she looks like she is doing the robot?
i was sitting in the back seat of her car with her boyfriend while she was driving. it was pretty awkward, but i dont think "so my dick's been in your girl's mouth too" was a good ice breaker
well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
I think it's a friendship ring and the other part is on his cats collar
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
The TA leading my study session just said "now get outta here. I need to get drunk before class"
I walked in and all four of you were covering your heads under the blanket singing waterslides in unison.
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
In honor of Super Tuesday, we should have the sex tonight.
When the people downstairs start talking about drugs, I second guess buying my drugs from them. Then I remember they are cheap and convenient.
I flashed my boobs, shit my pants, and kissed the wrong twin. I'm on a roll you don't want in on.
Randomize
