Why does every girl think its ok to cheat on their boyfriends with me?
Is it bad that I stopped wanting to fuck her as soon as I noticed she had dry skin?
I sometimes completely doubt that you're straight.
I'm scared. I feel like she's my mom and she just walked in on me having sex. Like she's "disappointed"
Just woke up. My philosophy paper is a play, and my paper for musical theater is about physics. That's some dank shit you sold me
I refuse to have another spring break doomed by pregnancy.
Dude she hit me with my own penis and it hurt. I've never been cock slapped but she slapped me with my own cock so it has to be worse.
We got to the second bar and all he kept saying was "I'm on an alcohol safari!" Best 21st birthday ever.
she sent me a picture of dilf asleep in bed with the caption "what happened last night?"
I find it fascinating that she'd be more comfortable with her mom finding out she submits dirty disney confessions on tumblr than about her secret email account she uses to chat with dutch and brazilian strangers.
he probably thinks i inited him over to have sex but really i just want to show him 90's music videos
As your friend, who loves and cares for you, I have to be honest. I am judging you so VERY hard right now. Sorry.
Lets get drunk. But not too drunk that I can't work in the morning. But maybe drunk enough so we'll make out
you should probably call the Bronx Zoo in the morning to formally apologize
its the right thing to do
I was literally so lonely last night that I stopped watching a video on porn hub and just read the comments
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
Randomize
