Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
I was in a threesome last night that turned into a violent domestic dispute with damage to a hotel. Wish you were there!
I put so much effort into my vagina today. If i don't get laid tonight I'm gonna be pissed.
dude there is absolutely no room for a slide in our room
Home. Barefoot. Drunk. Crying. Puked. Brushed teeth. Washed face. Dying. Need Cuddle.
Im going to make a sandwich and see if my books came from amazon. I cant believe two years ago i was dating eight guys and teaching russian exchange students how to do shots.
Bartender at the wedding asked if he was making my drinks too strong. I laughed at him.
My liver just had a heart attack.
I'm going to give blood tomorrow. Prepare yourself for pictures and a cynical poem about the heart and its level of tangibility.
What drugs are we doing when you visit?
The correct answer is all the drugs because I just found out they have glow in the dark bubbles.
Fuckin' raining men in my bedroom while I'm trying to drunk eat a rather large portion of pasta. Like shoo I already picked who I'm sleeping with. Pasta wins.
We single women of America need to make America great again by refusing to fuck anyone who supports Trump.
I was literally so lonely last night that I stopped watching a video on porn hub and just read the comments
She asked what the dent on the hood of my car was from..i think she knows we had sex up there
Just filed for child support I hope he gets the paperwork on Father's Day
Randomize
