I'll just wear something slutty to the liquor store and hope for the best
that's your solution for everything
I'm too hungover to be in a fucking cow suit right now
Just had a thought: were the sirens on when we were in the ambulance?
i was debating whether to load antoher bowl when i realized i was holding a sandwich in one hand and a cookie in the other. and laughing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
... I threw up in the shower this morning
You were "I'm not drunk" drunk.
I was feeling sad so bedroom vodka seemed like the best solution at the time.
Why am I the only one golf clapping for the vomiting girl on the train who just fell of her seat into her own vomit
I said that I'm avoiding parties and guys, and the freshman girl just laughed
My life is a clusterfuck of men and disorderly priorities right meow.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If Anthony Weiner can get in trouble for sexting 2 or 3 girls I dunno how politicians will make it in 10 years.
Lol I would vote for a guy that is trying to be a senator that has a viral video of him motorboating a topless chick
Don't send me nudes asking me to come fuck you on lunch break then send me a video of kids you're babysitting.
Wait I can't come yet Mr. Brightside is playing
ok i defs just took my shirt off in the middle of a frat party though so keep me updated
I need an outfit that says "thanks for hiring me" but also says "i want dick in my mouth".
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
You might see me up a tree with a deranged look in my eye , just walk away at that point
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