i feel like im doing the pre-walk of shame..like every car that drives by is like, ooooo look at that girl, in that itty bitty dress, yep shes about to get her skank on tonight...
Do you ever think God made girls unattractive around their periods as a warning?
Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
i climbed out of the bath tub this morning and found him taped to the treadmill
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I am getting drunk. And i'm going to paint my face and slide down the stairs like Pochahontas. Goodbye
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
How external is "for external use only"?
Had a booty call cancel on me tonight. Said he hurt his back. So this is what single and 30-something is like. Suck.
I had him autograph the condom wrapper.
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Fucken Tweens. They smelled like cotton candy and hand jobs my nostrils were offended.
I can already see the regret in her eyes. Amazing night. This city rules.
Look. If you're going to be my girlfriend you need to be down with me licking BBQ off your face infront of kids.
She came out of my bathroom wearing nothing but high top Converse, a leather jacket and a tongue stud. I love rock bars.
You KNOW it was a good night when you find French fries AND taco remnants in your bra when you get home...
I mean, if you want to light yourself on fire for maximum accuracy, far be it from me to stop you