clay aiken is like melissa ehteridge without the guitar.
We walked past a group of guys in front of a bar last night and they claimed, I quote: Wow, we'd actually have to work for that.
Is it a bad that I spent my 5 year anniversary with my husband texting my ex boyfriend?
imagine if the morning after your status automatically updated with the name of the person you hooked up with
Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
Note: footlong is not the password to the subway wi fi network.. p.s- im super high
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
I traded the garbage men the rest of my handle for a ride home. Best. Walk. Of. Shame. Ever.
I have a theory he's part Neanderthal
I yelled out look at all those hickeys. And then gave her boyfriend a high five
Super awkward that I just now realized I added no verb to the first statement about super hero porn. We were watching it, not making it. Clarity.
her wearing orange crocs at the bar was definitely a great form of contraception
I slept like a rock because of your dick. I'll thank him personally later.
Always great to be boarding a plane when you realize that what you thought was gas is actually very untrustworthy
Whats a little breast milk between friends?
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