sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
I locked the porch door but I left a spare key on top of the keg on the side of the house
Just puked up hair, tacos and vodka. Hello Memorial Day weekend.
I five year old is judging me because I just opened a bottle of Sam Adams with my teeth before 8am
She looked at me and said "i like penises." and then passed out with her condom balloon animal in her hands.
I need to stop smoking. I just talked to corn.
He kissed my hand AND my forehead. I don't think this virginity business is for heartless whores like us.
I wonder how your parents would feel if the scarf they gave me for Christmas is mainly being used for a blindfold during sex...
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
We had to take the hinges off the bathroom door. Needless to say, you are no longer welcome at that bar
I'm high. Everything has a 45° angle. That is as far as my eyes open
Good luck. While you're suffocating on a dick, I'll be eating pizza rolls. Being a good girl.
so... i have a picture of you and three other girls making kissy faces at this giant stuffed banana you're holding. however, you seem to be violently screaming at it.
Those bitches did NOT have my back.
She said if you lived here it would be like the x rated version of 3's company
Randomize