In line at the arbys drive thru on foot. Legendary.
Just gave my little brother the collection of clothes that boys have left in my room since I've been in college for his birthday.
Does he not understand that naked slip and slide needs supervision after dark?!
We can't bring brittanys dog so we are getting high and getting in my bathtub I think it's pretty safe
I wasn't concerned until I realized he was using the vase my birthday flowers came in as a " big glass" for his 151 and coke.
I don't want a mention or even a whisper of a Shakespeare Festival by that or any other name including, but not limited to, a fucking Renaissance Fair. Are we clear? It will be a DEALBREAKER .
I had to rub one out before the Shabbat dinner in case I find a nice Jewish girl to fuck me in the bathroom.
Your mother would be so proud
It was the hardest I ever came in my life and once I could see straight again I just looked at him and said "cool"
I woke up to find a bottle of Bacardi in my shower rack. How was your night?
Are you 5:30 blackout again?
best way to lose double chin? blow jobs. I am fucking hurting.
I'm sitting at my kitchen table alone dressed as a dinosaur smoking bowls in the dark. Is this rock bottom? Or is this living the dream? Who's to say
I needed to pee, so I climbed out his window
Here’s how sick I am. I’m not hungry. I don’t want coffee. And I don’t want dick. So, you know it’s bad.
wish he had known he had poison ivy on his cock beforehand... Is calamine okay to put on your vag?..
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