Yes give me all the cream and he's gone
I lost of the blow last night. Found it later in my bag labeled Fairy Dust.
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
okay I may or may not have wrapped my body pillow up in your t-shirt and sprayed it with your axe and am now spooning with it.
again? I'm starting to get a little creeped out now.
You stole her bday cake and shared it with drunk strangers on the street.
I don't think you'd be able to understand Inception if you weren't high...
i just realized i dont have a sober facebook picture since 2007
We're friends with people in his circle of friends so we're half way in. It's like I've already given him a hand job.
We need to buy some popsicles so we can remind ourselves we're good at this.
I'm going to tattoo a maze on my back for the next fucker that tries to blow early ....
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
Did you catch one of my beer pong balls in your cleavage or was that a dream?
Apparently I had 2 bloody noses and after my sis put me to bed at the hotel, I escaped and my sister's friend found me in an elevator with some guy
Since when is my clitoris pierced?
I just remembered that I insisted everyone watch porn together last night.
Randomize
