She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
i just walked by a road side game of beer pong? it's gonna be a long day
So Easter dinner for me was at 4:40 this morning where i made Bagel Bites and had a glass of Chardonnay
I hope my sperm were as drunk as I was.
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
Who showers for four hours?!
It was like a tropical nap.
He told me he felt like he was just pistol-whipped by Testicle Man.
i just got referred to as "the Loch Ness Cockster". God bless my Scottish heritage.
I'm totally going to bang the cable guy tonight. I'm so pumped
If a clean cut ginger with a flannel and tattoos shows up at the apartment, he is allowed inside.
She kept giving the uber driving directions and we all thought they were wrong so we'd send him the other way. Turns out she wasn't guiding us home, but to the half gallon that she hid in the bushes on the way to the bar.
He passed away peacefully doing what he loved to do best. Eating a pound of vodka gummy worms and failing at sex and the city trivia.
Not only did I sleep with the guy but I think I may have called my work and quit to go work for him.
Any who, I expect to be showered with roses apon my arrival
How about beer and nachos?
A fine substitute!
Me and my boss just exchanged pictures of our bongs and such...I don't know I feel about this
Randomize
