Wow, your whole life is a joke regardless of the fact that its april fools day
Where are you?
In a non slutty way
Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
Um....I woke up to a lipgloss covered bottle of Jack daniels in my arms..
You've kissed worse.
I knocked on some strangers door, you didn't have to give me a fake hotel room number
bitch please you did NOT just unlike my status..
Motor boating, judging by the amount of lipstick I found I would say between 6 to 8 times
He's warming up to shark week, by only eating fish and drinking vodka, and all the time he keeps yelling "death to the seals!"
We're stoned and watching little Einstein videos. Come. Over. Now.
THE ALMIGHTY HAS FALLEN DRUNKENLY OFF HIS HIGH HORSE AND INTO HOLLY'S VAGINA
She asked if I wanted to "Mormon Motorboat" her, which I guess is just motor-boating her through her cloths. Turns out I did.
Wanna shave the hair on my back? If you're offended I was joking, if not I'll bring booze and maybe you can do other regions too.
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
I can't decide if this outfit makes me look like a pirate. I also can't decide if I care if it does.
I just kept eating and watching him slide down the stairs head first
Randomize
