Holy wow, I found all the old poems u wrote me back when we were in looooooooove...just sort of wild to look back on, thought u'd like that
she said i have a nice penis, i told her only bob saget and god could judge that.
my goal in life is to wake up with my underwear on
so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
He decided not to draw dicks on my face when I passed out because he was afraid I'd retaliate and superglue his dick to his stomach....he knows me too well.
I made him a flow chart of what to do if I got arrested.
Did I really just find a cheez- it box full of condoms in your room?
N.C. cops just used a megaphone to tell me I have a slutty outfit. My life is complete.
His new place is a molesden. Like a hole in the ground. It's frightening how oddly private it is.
It rubs the lotion on it's foreskin...
I have a fever. Last thing I need to do tonight is be elbow deep in old lady pussy.
I vote we get high and sneak off to McDonald's to get mcflurries.
YES. ALL MY YES.
I think I died and satan has brought me back to life and I'm paying for my sins with this hangover
I felt I lost my designated buddy on a field trip when you wandered off to get high with strangers.
RAAAAAAAAWWWWRRRRRR
THATS ME HOWLING MY ENJOYMENT OF THE THINGS WE CAN DO WHILE GETTING DRUNK
There's a rash on my genitals that would like a word with you.
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