im orety awesome arent i? relly i know i am
Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
Update, blind date is cute and fun.
Scratch that, blind date just threw up.
i have accomplished my summer goal of being able to relate to every taylor swift song
Just saw a guy wearing pink jeans and i bet he's straight. Fuck 2009.
that's the ideal party shoe. cute, but i can still puke in them.
im trying to make cookies in the george foreman
oh yeah I know that guy. he's legit. slept in my closet a few times
she just gave me a present from you... on a stripper pole. in front of the whole club. :)
WHY ISNT THIS A PICTURE MESSAGE
im laying here in the parking lot drinking a warm coke, prob still drunk, feeling like i need to apologize to everyone i know
At some point we were all eating banana flavored rolling papers.
We poured some Korbel out for our homie Dick Clark.
OH FOR FUCKS SAKE! SOMEONE TOOK ME FOR A GODDAMN PROSTITUTE!! IM WEARING LEG WARMERS!!! THAT IS LIKE THE LEAST HOOKERISH THING TO WEAR!
He will be so fat that the winter can not penetrate his blubber.
He told me he loved me and I told him I shit myself
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