it's fine if we fail the bar, we were never going to satisfy the moral character requirement anyway
I could write a book on how to barely get by in community college. I just took an online quiz on my phone, at the bar, 6 minutes before it was due.
Land Before Time marathon. we drink every time littlefoot almost eats a treestar.
Just rented the SCUBA equipment. Meet me at the pool to test the underwater beer bong idea.
We've gotten 3 pitchers already by trading for CUPCAKES
Hey man. We haven't met but my name is Ben. I threw up a bunch at your house last night. I heard you smoke though so I'll smoke you out anytime.
I just really need a hug and a shower beer
If your nipples ruin my wedding photos I will kill you.
You know I think I am ok with him not moving in yet. He came over, fixed my closet, ate me out, and left. I'm now in sweats drinking coke and rum and watching new girl. This works for me.
You could woo kevin with a boquet of breakfast burritos. He loves those burritos. You could use the hot sauce packets like babies breathe
He went down on me for an hour and a half. He needs to get promoted more often.
I woke up with clothes on this morning and I'm pretty sure you had something to do with that. Thank you.
You kept saying “keke” over and over so I slapped you then you proceeded to ask if I loved you. In case you’re wondering why you have a black eye - Lauren
sam was dropping a deuce next to me. wrote me a note that said "glad we shared this experience." passed it under the wrong stall. the other guy picked it up. that's all I know so far.
Dude I had my dad cock block me once
Randomize
