I can't make any promises. I've tried my best to stay celibate. But if a guys on top of me, Im gonna tell him to stick it in.
Do u think I can claim pregnancy as an accident so my insurance covers it?
We took shots in honor of Shark Week.
I've drank myself into a smaller pants size. Who ever said alcoholism was unhealthy was mistaken.
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I told her the maid must have stolen all my condoms. She bought it
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
I now have a GPA requirement for guys I hookup with more than once.
Passed out mid cig in bed last night. Thank you cough for allowing me legal prescription hydrocodone.
I didn't have the heart to tell him that the reason my vagina was so "prelubricated" was because I had just had another gentleman caller an hour earlier. So, when he commented about how turned on I appeared, I just went with it.
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I had one beer! ONE BEER! They took shots in mourning of my tolerance last night. My ability to drink is a joke.
I just jerked him off with one hand while holding my wine glass with the other and watching Congo. I feel like this was a preview to my married life...
I moved to this city Tuesday and got laid Saturday. Still got it.
There's a dryer on fire at the laundromat, and everyone's just standing around taking pictures. Except me. I'm texting.
Fuck man, I am really high rn and all I've eaten is different forms of pie
Just fyi i'm now butt naked in a steam room smoking a bong in some guys house. i sense the weed penetrating my pores.
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