Duck Duck Cougar?
She told me I was only the second guy she slept with. I told her she was only my second Megan.
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
Who the fuck was that guy he kept pulling his dick out walking up to people trying to hand it to people and saying go ahead open the door like it was a door knob
If this party got busted it would be an improvement
She slapped me in the face with a McDouble. Just threw it right at my face while I was driving... That is why we can't bring her out in public.
You told me that they girl who was giving you a handjob under the table looked a little like your sister
I'm in a dress, surrounded by Republicans, and the bartender just told me he's "out of Jack Daniels" in a very accusatory tone. Shit, is it only 8 PM?
I think its awesome that i just got you to cheer for sex
Well sex is awesome. Sex deserves cheers.
He was on top and as he finished he yelled "I love gold" , so yeah I'm seeing him later tonight
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
Being in the club with your moms drunk friends > having a healthy relationship with your mom
No. You're getting a Viking funeral and I'm pawning your shit.
I appreciate your acceptance of my lack of morals
She has no problem going ass to mouth, but won't eat the pizza crust. I don't get it.
Randomize
