ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
He came and then made the Jim Halpert face. does that say disappointment or what
May or may not have found my way onto a stripper bus. To Chicago.
And we should impose a 'friends don't let friends order 25 shots at last call' rule
Maid of honor is brides sister and single. Likes lemondrops. You're welcome.
I have a meeting at work in an hour, I'm so hungover going outside is NOT happening there are roads and shit I'll totally get myself killed.
I've friend zoned this boy hard. I made him change my nipple rings before he went home.
Used my phone to vibrate 'eye of the tiger'. It's like Rocky is punching my nuts, but gently.
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
He's rapping about a turtle neck sweater. Please come get me.
Hooker in the library. I repeat, we have a hooker in the library. This is not a drill.
I had a drink called "the white nun." It tasted like Marshmallows, and celibacy.
I couldn't find pants for like 20 minutes so I was butt ass naked just sitting on your floor
I can't hangout tonight, I have a phone sex appointment at 10
You're now part of the minority of friends who haven't seen my boobs.
Randomize