Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
there are certain things about getting into a cab to go home at 630 am that make me feel like a prostitute.
I feel like I just walked the hall of shame thru the marriott. Everyone stared.
I think it was the shoes and limping. Not the sex. I could b wrong.
We are having a competition to see who can masterbate in the wierdest place, right now hes winning since he masterbated on his Jr. High school bus.
I'd like to bring you 40 virgins and treasure chests of gold to make you feel better
my professor saw me buying beer for the super bowl and said go patriots. thats how i know im getting an A in his class.
The money is just too good to quit doing it. I'm using the same justification strippers use.
I don't think people appreciate how hard it is to fuck in a portapotty. Sarah and I had train for that shit.
After her AA meeting, she was on the phone with her mom, and when she said, "they're making me start over with Step 1," I quietly sang, "cut a hole in the box".
At tuba camp, the pickings are slim. It's like being the tallest midget.
Take a shit and have a hit. It's the Sunday Funday Rule.
The first guy I ever sexted is having a baby.. Is this what adulthood feels like?
DUDE. HOLY FUCK MY PRINCIPAL WAS JUST MY UBER DRIVER. I AM LITERALLY TRAUMATIZED. ANS DRUNK. HOLY FUCK OMG
Fyi, shaking your genitals at me doesn't count as "trying to have sex".
She's still here. My penis can feel it.
Dude, I think she left with some dude like an hour ago
FOUND HER. I swear this thing is like a metal-detector
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