if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
mom just called and i was mid bong hit but i answered anyways coughing and sounding rough she the apologized for waking her little angel up. its 2PM
We're too lazy to do dishes, so we're making sangria in a flower vase.
I don't know what he did but now I'm terrified of mustache rides and it's only movember 3rd
As his dick went in he shouted GOAL at the top of his voice.
Look man, sometimes you just gotta say "Sure! Why not? I can always take a shower afterwards"
I saw a guy do a line this morning in line to start the 5k, happy thanksgiving!
She crossed her eyes and threw up into a glass while sitting at the bar. It was fifty shades of sketchy dude.
We fucked through the entire Destiny's Child album, it was a beautiful thing.
Did you hook up with him before or after he shaved off half of his eyebrow?
she keeps a switchblade in her panty drawer... i am both terrified and slightly turned on
I feel horrible. I brought her to your house like a late night pizza delivery and dropped her off.
All I could think about while we were fucking was what Hogwarts house he would be in
All I've done today is nap, eat candy and get off from my vibrator. I didn't know it was possible to be THIS single.
You could at least care enough to fake an orgasm for me.
Randomize
