if only i could text you this smell
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
I never once brought up his unibrow when he was insulting me. That's class.
every time i recognize a doctor or patient at the hospital on this rotation, i just pray it's not from my blackout saturday makeout slut moments...professionalism shouldn't count on weekends
Just gave some kid head in the library. Perfect way to end the semester.
Apparently I was the fucked up drunk guy greeting people at the hotel in the lobby last night.
You almost set me on fire last night.
You probably deserved it.
This guy keeps going off in the metal detector. When is it appropriate for me to punch him in the throat just in case?
Would it be weird to tell him that on his b'day he's dressing up and we're having weird Jesus sex?
I'm trying to get fucked by 4 girls here, and you're worried about verb tenses?!
Duuuuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fruuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fuuuck
yyyea i think im gonna go get a bowl and play skyrim. And by bowl i mean something i can throw up in, not weed
Honestly I don't even have room for feelings after that Taco Bell
He used the term 'cock-staggering' in an email. So needless to say things are going pretty well.
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
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