Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
can't wait for January to be Over so I don't have to see all the fat resolutionists working out.
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
Shared a jello shot with her mom last night. then she tucked me in and took of my shoes for me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Guess whose mug shot is NOT on the Internet anymore?!?!
Totally sleeping on a bloodstained mattress tonight. I love life's little adventures.
I was out with the drag queens until 7am. This is the hangover I needed to kick my ass back to sobriety. Dear Virgin Mary, fuck my life.
I feel like we should actually go to church one of these days to thank god for saving us from herpes and babies.
I know shes my ex. And I know she punched me in the face and stole my car to go get drunk. But it's the best sex I've ever had.
You're sick. Take pictures if you can.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When you get up and look at yourself in the mirror, don't be alarmed. The doctor assured us last night that it looked way worse than it actually was and there won't be a scar when the stitches come out
Got laid in my rudolph onesie for the second year in a row. New tradition? Absolutely.
I think pretend fucking a camel is a good thing to do downtown. They loved me.
Best feedback on my performance so far: "There are things that can't be unseen."
I can feel my teeth in 4 dimensions. I shouldnt be this high at 8 in the morning.
I'm studying. And by studying I mean I am laying on my floor drinking boones farm alone. Last two weeks. Fuck it.
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