what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
we just drove by a car that was painted for a grad, it said "you done it!" with a confederate flag bumper sticker next to it. i love kentucky
All I've consumed over the last couple days is Vanilla Coke, semen, and Coors. I don't think today will be any different.
My weekend will be all about the double d's, desert & debauchery
Trust me man, I did not put any cookies down your pants when you slept.
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
I'm sorry for aggressively singing the Frasier theme song at you so many times last night.
But there's never enough margarita money.
This is going to be one of those situations where we lose a day, isn't it
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
I am watching xfiles and eating microwaved cookiedough, and I see nothing wrong with it.
I was drunk in the shower and i decided to shave. Im now bleeding to death
Remember the random guy who licked my face when we were at the bar the other night?
Yeah. His name is Andrew. We just met
When I told the bartender it was my 21st birthday, he looked at me all pissed and said "But you've been drinking here as 21 for the past 2 years.." How do you THINK the night went?
So I take it free shots were a no after that?
this bedazzled flask is my best investment yet
so you might not believe this but he made a powerpoint. and gave you a 3.5/10.
Randomize
