i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
people are starting to question the shark bite story
Who is this?
You offered to lift up your dress at the bar so I could see your lower back tattoo
Um, I think that was a general offer to everyone. So...who IS this?
To my wonderful winter break booty calls: thank you for making this holiday season enjoyable. I look forward to seeing you boys again this summer.
Jared is "trying to bite a strangers hat off" drunk. Oh, and that stranger is a girl at a table of 5 guys, one girl.
This football player keeps talking about his drunk dad. I think he may start crying. Does this deserve a roll tide?
I woke up on your bathroom floor, i used your towel I found laying on the floor as a cape to get to your bed. I thought it would help me walk straight if I looked like a superhero
Everything was going great until my fake mustache fell off when we started making out.
Yeah man i woke up and only had a Jimmy John's wrapper covering myself..
I understand that just don't try to seduce me while making frozen pizza again.
Fucking shoot me with this y'all shit. You were in Texas for 2months you do not have an accent Madonna
You know that if they offer you a bagel they are determined to sleep with you, right?
No one with a hairstyle like that is allowed to insult anyone for anything
She was riding me and giving me score updates to the basketball game at the same time..... Shes a keeper
where are my pants?
in the oven.
Randomize
