it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
He threw up in the campfire, the alcohol in his puke caught on fire. Im marrying this man
Ohhh,that's true. Babies are only fun when you're high. Otherwise, they're the worst kind of people.
The only way I can describe the noise he makes when he has an orgasm: dying walrus.
That man deserves a slow clap... He defied the power of the vagina
Just puke out the sadness. Like a fuckin dragon.
I just asked her to come in through the window, this pretty much solidifies the whole fuck-buddy thing...
Yeah sorry about that. I got pulled into the Russian student society's end of term party. There was too much vodka and eurodance to come help you pack.
I asked him for something to clean up with after sex and he handed me a sham wow. A SHAM WOW
If you get any calls give me a heads up. Im drinking rum in my underwear on the back porch.
You're either getting fucked or a coupon to Friendly's. I haven't decided yet.
Man, I miss taking bong rips in my room. Now they are bringing dogs around so all my stuff is hidden in random places up in the woods. I literaly have to hunt and gather just to get high.
i'm bringing homemade birthday cake and homegrown weed. how awesome is this text?
Went to waffle house after dropping my sister off at school and got into a heated argument with a drunk/hungover philosophy professor I will not name. I won the argument.
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