his cum tasted like old pizza and looked like old milk
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
is it bad i banged a 25yr kindergarten teacher last night?
No thats like a top 10
The google font looked peculiar last night, but then up close I realized it was just dry vomit.
man, work is way more interesting with these acid flashbacks.
Define 'illegal'. Your idea of it and my idea are in separate universes.
Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier
Half my face is frozen, my vagina is broken, I'm wearing only gym shorts eating a plate of mashed potatoes, avatar is on my tv. There's a naked guy on my couch whose name idk. I needa talk to you asap
Time for jim to play the "dont seriously consider pooping in the trash" game
I want you to read this conversation tomorrow and be proud of the fact that you taught me how to decipher any drunk message. Good job.
An image of us stuck like that like Pompeii comes to mind. A wonder for future anthropologists
I haven't been that free with the boobs since I was 19. I'm putting them away for a while.
If you insist
The one guy literally flopped my boob out. Yes I insist.
I just feel like I'm worth a little bit more than your recycled nudes...
we're forecasting high levels of inebriation into the evening with dropping temperatures late at night
I just learned that the grill marks on a Burger King burger patty are actually previously burnt on there with a radioactive spray-on liquid and McDonald's french fries are actually 5% potato.
Randomize
