So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
Our house smells like week old pizza, beer cans, cigarettes, and depressing career tracks....get lysol.
please tell me if i'm home and in my bed
negative
come find me please
he said he wished he had more hands so he could firmly hold my boobs.
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she passed on me to fuck the foreign guy. is there a manlier, slightly less gay way of saying "always the bridesmaid, never the bride"?
nope.
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
Define 'illegal'. Your idea of it and my idea are in separate universes.
Good idea. You gotta take care of your vagina. She takes care of you. Pay it forward.
My goal for break? Fuck all my exes in reverse order.
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he busted into the room with single cheese slices and started yelling "THROW SOME CHEESE ON THAT BITCH"
"Grocery shopping" is really just a euphemism for spending $20 on enough frozen food to last 2 weeks and spending the rest of your viable paycheck on alcohol.
He pointed at me, then leaned in and said "shes the best at blow jobs" then chris fist pumped him and said "dude, I know"
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
Would it be inappropriate to meet you at the airport after your family vacation so I can tell you all about the amazing sex I have been having?
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
Randomize