I wish I had a "puke in your car" emoticon
Yes I want to fuck your friends but it's out of respect and love for you.
Is it penis luge time yet?
he said good things come in small packages and I decided to hook up with someone else
I had to wash my hair with conditioner because my sister got hammered and gave the dog a 3am sprinkler bath with my shampoo.
Question. Was fucking Laura an entirely regrettable decision?
like...quickly.
You know it was a good night when you're lying on the couch in your pjs at 4pm having a pitcher of ice water for breakfast.
Everyone was soo nice and genuine.. Then again it coulda just been the drugs.
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
It was bitter sweet because I woke him up with sex but then I peed in his bed with him in it
It was a great party. People were literally still doing shots and playing drunk Jenga at 6am...
Just screamed wow while using my vibrator.. new low
I'd like to buy a season pass to your dick please.
So if i am talking to a guy and he sends me a pic and he is wearing Spiderman button down dress shirt.... Is it ok if i dont want to talk to him anymore?
I just met his mom for the first time with a hang over. Then we went to watch his 8 year old cousin get baptized. Apparently his family loves me. I should drink more often.
Randomize
