Wish I didn't live with 3 girls so I could beat off in peace.
It's cute how he thinks we're going to have sex again
Because it is about to snow, I sent him for Diet Coke and cigarettes. It's the gay version of milk and bread.
i need to buy one of the child leashes to wear at mardi gras or else im never making it out alive
SURVIVED FINALS. CAN'T DIE FROM ALCOHOL POISONING. NOTHER SHOT. CAPS.
Precisely. She's an awesome drinking companion; yet, not so awesome mother-in-law material.
There was a half eaten cheeseburger on my coffee table. Guess I made it to McDonald's.
Joined a porch party below me by climbing out the window and jumping off the roof. Tonight will be good
I feel a whole lot better than i did this morning at 3 when one of my roommates discovered me slightly aware of my surroundings and naked in the bath tub with the shower on
maby next time we don't finish the whole box wine just because it tastes like shit
I told him we could fuck whenever was concurrent for both of us
he was definitely tindering while i gave him head
As much of a hooker as I am you don't slam where you drink
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
Sitting in the car eating a bagel. Watching a guy do tai chi in the parking lot. My morning is fabulous
And then there was cum in my hair and he was making beans.
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