So the "just a friend" kid confessed his love for me...sometimes I hate how awesome I am.
He had the Transformers symbol tattooed to his chest. We had to do it doggy style so I could laugh into my pillow instead of his face.
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
the last thing i remember is ordering pitchers of white russians....
Some girl at the bar was showing us her chipped tooth as a pick up line.
Is it possible to just pretend that everything we did after grilling up your goldfish didn't happen?
I managed to make myself a bowl of apple jacks, took one bite and had to stop eating them because they were making my brain wiggle. How was your comedown?
Is selling savings bonds for acid money something a normal person does?
He said I looked like a ballsack and I tried to choke him out with my Ghostbusters pajama pants. Happy fucking Halloween.
Taylor Swift needs more songs about threesomes. I'm not sure she gets me anymore.
He invited to drink but spelled forties wrong so no thx
I have a cat for love and a booty call for sex. What else could I need?
How many more times can I say I need to get laid before you kill me?
now to finish some work and then i think i'll work out. or garden. or at the very least I'll continue eating frozen grapes and take more drugs
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
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