The walk of shame is so much worse when you've spent the night third wheeling.
Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
I was doing the dishes wondering what was with all the tiny little cups, but then I remembered that some people drink things other than huge mixed drinks and big cups of water the next day.
i was trying to give him roadhead and my tits kept knocking his cheap shifter into neutral...was the first time my tits have ever cock blocked me
He came in my eye, I lost my earring and all of his friends saw me topless. Happy New Year to you as well.
But it's not about our feelings, it's about making the men we sleep with feel awful about their lives
I feel like I just gave a blowjob to a freight train.
Im at target. Idk why I'm buying condoms AND a tutu for my cat. No one who dresses their cat up has ever gotten laid.
first reaction to dying the pubes purple - awesome. Reaction after I explain the process - not awesome. Hypothesis? when girls find out you know to bleach and dye your hair, they're turned off.
I got to the party and found your shoes in a bag of Funyuns. You weren't even there.
How early is too early for a booty call on a Monday night?
Hey guys so who is Justin McGoo and why did I text him "fuck yooooouuu juuuustiiin mcgooo" at 12:06am on Thursday night?
Wait, there's no way I said I would suck his dick. I know drunk Katie.
No, you told him to suck YOUR dick.
See now that sounds like drunk Katie.
Now swiping left on 23-year-olds with abs. Is this adulting?
I need advice on ways to politely say “fuck you on your way to hell”.
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