i can't wait to kiss dudes with my vampire teeth in.
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
and honestly a story about how you met your future husband that DOESN'T include the words "creeped him on facebook" is really not a story worth sharing
I have a spoon shaped bruise on my ass...
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
Oh and you pulled your pants down outside in front of like five people, held my hand, then peed.
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
She scratched my sunburn during sex. I didn't know whether to cry or cum
Drunkenly bought a $240 realtor course last night. Apparently even drunk me thinks my future is going nowhere
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
Also, the greatest of ironies: I got shampoo confiscated by security while Corey managed to get pot through. MERICA!
Drove by a cop already pulling someone over and toasted him with my bong
It's 4 in the afternoon........
Obviously last night's theme was "Let's Make Bad Life Choices"
i just got drunk and created an entire Dr Seuss unit for my first graders.
that lady just saw me taking a picture of her baby... It's time to leave.
Randomize
