Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
Her sex list was a LOT longer than mine. She tried to justify it by saying '4 of those don't count because they were in the gang bang'.
She challenged me to a game of rock-paper-scissors for her virginity. I love this girl.
She swallowed my jizz and then took a shot of jack daniels and said "chaser." This cant be real life.
You walked in with a firecracker and a doughnut then demonstrated what a lazy job he did fucking you
Why are there sofa cushions on the floor? And why isn't there a sofa in this room that doesn't have cushions?
Why is your name written on my hand surrounded by hearts and a bartenders phone number?
This dude has my number from April last year. Drunk me left sober me a puzzle. No confirmation of pants off business
There's a homeless man outside the bar. I have a toothbrush and toothpaste in my car. I think i'm going to give them to him. And they said drinking is bad.
You're so thoughtful.
Um...celebrating is an understatement. You flashed the guy at the mexican restaurant and then screamed, "It's just my bikini, I swear!"
So note to self oboe reeds soaked in Apple Rubinoff sound GREAT.
Dude it's huge. I don't usually like looking at those things, but you're kind of forced to stare that horse in the face.
Im hitting on this chick at a stoplight when all the sudden. i notice this chick blowing some dude in the backseat.
I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but yours is no longer the biggest penis I've seen. It is however, still the prettiest.
Shelly has the weirdest luck. Dude offered her a job riding a bucking bronco and it was not porn or stripping but an actual g-d cow.
Randomize
