So random guy from last night came over tonight. I told myself I wasn't going to sleep with him but he had some killer dirty talk and a big penis in his arsenal...what was I supposed to do? Supposedly he lost his virginity to his wife and since their divorce a year ago I'm the 1st girl he's slept with, I feel like I just re-took his virginity...I feel like a rockstar.
Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
WE WERE REALLY IN A PORNO LAST NIGHT
I just watched a girl at work pick her nose with 4 of her 5 fingers. So I now know what sausage biscuits taste like in vomit form.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
okay I may or may not have wrapped my body pillow up in your t-shirt and sprayed it with your axe and am now spooning with it.
again? I'm starting to get a little creeped out now.
she was like the girl next door.. if you lived next door to a whorehouse
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
At least I cut out the pieces of your hair where I braided gum into it last night. Thank me later.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
UPDATE: WE WILL BE HITTING THE BATMAN PINATA WITH A SWORD
I have a boner and a quesadilla why aren't you here
Please come home, i don't want to feel like basket garbage girl but I'm in your alleyway and not sure how to change that.
I found some video of you on my camera that's like 5 seconds long, where you announce that you should have been a dentist before taking a bong hit.
Well my normal tinder strategy of "Will I have sex with her when I'm sober" has been paying off
OH DEAR GOD IT GOT IN MY MOUTH AGAIN HELP
Randomize