i may or may not have been spotted by tourists while getting head in the vicinity of the jefferson memorial
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
I noticed when you had too much when you were yelling "HOE-HAVE-A-SEAT" to his cat.
Just pooped at the strip club. NOT NORMAL . I may be a little too comfortable here.
I realised my life had gone downhill since being unemployed when I was making key lime pie on acid at 3am Tuesday morning.
I'm not saying Tijuana was a bad idea, I'm saying that we make poor life choices. And Steve was robbed by the police.
Someone snapchat me a pic of you topless laying on the bar with Scotty pouring a bottle of tequila down your throat. IT'S NOT EVEN ELEVEN YET.
School starts next week
Do you think if i wear this shirt with my bengals boxers this kid will fall out of love with me a little bit because that's what I was going for.
Hyyypothetically, what would you do if you happened to see my boobs on the internet?
I'm more of a "get high and take a bath" kinda guy.
Can I just text her like "yo sorry I fucked your boyfriend, let's go get sushi" or like nah
omg so there's this guy on the roof and he just stripped for no reason and now i think he's making out on the rooftop with some other guy? who are these people
Sorry I peed on your ottoman
You are a genius and a whore.
Pretty sure my aunt hooked up with one of my brothers frat brothers at his graduation party
Randomize
