problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
no you're not listening to me HE WANTED TO BRAID MY HAIR
Just set all my clocks a minute apart. Now my 4:20 is longer by sixfold
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
not only did i soak my thesis by spilling celebratory shots on it, but i also stained it with lipstick making it obvious i tried to drink the vodka off it......dgaf, worth it.
yeah, it's no longer just 'day drinking' when it's 5pm and you're knocking over fruit displays at fresh market
Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
Check Facebook. Random dude tagged us in photos from last night dancing at Denny's while eating a sampler platter. 1. How does he have our names, and 2. You said we ate at Tbell.
remember that guy i blew in a bathroom in barcelona, i just blew him again in rome. lightning does strike twice.
She asked me to head butt her and after half a bottle of whiskey that seemed reasonable.
I just want to nap and funnel a bottle of wine in a cute dress
You think I could convince him that having sex with another girl isn't cheating?
I just discovered that jello shots are the best hangover cure
You said that last night when you did jello shots at 4am
Omg. I'm living macklemores best life. I have someone's granddads dog, I'm about to have someone's grandmas car. I look incredible.
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