you always know who the new freshman are on fb because theyre always wearing prom dresses
Hiding in the clothes rack at walmart like a 4 year old. Already scared 3 people. New fav weekend activity
he saw my boobs and came all over himself... there goes my whole night.
I gave ten strangers a full description of his penis and its abilities. I need to stop drinking.
hey you knew what you were in for when i showed up with 2 fifths of Jim. plus i left money to pay for a new sink
All I had with a note saying that my shoes are in the ceiling and good luck.
im trying to find a facebook picture of him that doesnt make me regret sleeping with him. its not working
i wanna meet her so much more now that I know she got toed in a hottub.
This girl just swallowed a pealed banana whole. I'm not worthy.
We were Chugging coronas for the soul purpose of launching limes out of the 3rd story window, I'd say it was a good weekend
And. I know i am a gay man cause when i saw the pic of his cock his feet were in it and i am like what the fuck?
Suppose hypothetically u received a request for face time communication with a gentleman who looked astonishingly like a penis. Would you indulge him in conversation? Hypothetically of course.
Does Jesus have blonde highlights? Pretty sure I saw him in a lavender shirt and Sperry's.
You know you gave a quality blow job when you have to ice your neck and jaw the next day.
How are they?
Amazing! These new boobs are going to break blouse buttons and wedding vows!
Randomize
