bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
I am stoned and watching Pocahontas. I am letting the kids eat whatever they want. I am the best babysitter in the whole wide world
just heard 2 nerds making fun of a girl for mispronouncing stochiometry. they followed it up by discussing the mathematical equation for getting laid. my day just became 100x better.
I mean come on, he's the best quarterback in the state and doesn't even know how to put on condom
Would it be inappropriate to do lines in front of the cable guy?
Her best friend sent her a random hate text and the song they played at her father's funeral came on the radio. I just got cock blocked by the universe
You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
Please tell me what happened last night... specifically who told me it was a good idea to pee in my shoe.
It's official drugs can't kill me
Just made a beer run. At 9am. In my pjs. I should not be graduating today
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
I'm getting a car wash man. I am go get a car wash high.
Would you accept a fantastic blowjob as payment?
She just started crying. With my dick still inside her. Something about her grandpa.
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
Randomize
