Pretty sure I only gave out my other # though. You know, 777 777-7777
Hahaha. So was it a Freudian slip, or wishful thinking? ;)
Could be either seeing as you're in my phone as "3rd bar" and I couldn't pick you outta a line up.
Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
i broke up with my boyfriend last night because i had to eat a freezy pop in every color and he ate the last blue one. i sat on the floor and cried for an hour at least. everyone left. so i decided that this whole weed thing isnt really healthy for my relationships.
you know you were refereeing rock paper scissors for who got to make out with your sister right?
when she was 9 she got kicked out of our 4-H camp dance for pole dancing on the spirit stick
I decided to buy a keg of Miller Lite instead of paying the electric bill. Just thought I'd give you a heads up...
just to let ya know we might have to take a stripper snowboardin sometime
She said " I'm going to get her back one day soon for putting extacy in my pop while I drove her to whislter" just a heads up.
ATTN: We are officially 15 weeks from our annual "Get-Mega-Stoned-and-BBQ" event. Start saving up the proper supplies. That is all.
I'm having an emotional breakdown watching baby sloths on YouTube you need to come save me from myself.
At first I was nervous about leaving him my undergraduate legacy, but apparently he made out with lesbians, woke up with hickeys and a different shirt. My family name will survive.
I didn't think it was possible but he dislocated his thumb during intercourse last night then cried
Drunk me just left a note for sober me apologizing for all the fucking crumbs in our bed
The quality of my porn watching experience has significantly declined. Thanks shattered iphone screen
Ate 5 hotdogs today. You need to get me back on my tequila diet cause this shit has to stop!
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