i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
He has that cheese in a can and he's eating it. I have never seen that outside a goofy movie.
He was singing "i gotta feeling" under his breath as i was pulling my top off.
We lit firecrackers from NYE in the fireplace and he was so passed out that he slept through it.
AND BY FEELINGS I MEAN VODKA
I don't save the phone numbers of guys I don't like. That way it's a surprise when a random number texts me and tells me I have great tits.
Is this the 6 foot tall blonde I screwed in the bar last weekend?
In the bar?! Very impressive! But keep guessing!
Also this guy fingered me at the bar and then gave me his card
Guess what I'm doing tonight? Tacos and strip chess.
he went to the bathroom at 5am only to come back and squeeze my boob before going back to sleep
My nerves will need dicks later so.. I'll call you
He put rainforest music on before we had sex I felt like I was in the Amazon
Do you have Pokemon Go yet? I just caught a Clefairy on my walk of shame and feel way better about myself.
I'm basically the yoda of knowing when someone wants to sleep with you
Randomize
