I don't usually arrange sex via text message
you started puking right when a nickelback song came on..it was epic
I sold 10 pepperonis for 5 dollars last night....i fucking love drunk people
I tried to put the left over margartia in a box for you but they wouldn't let me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah you fell over while you were peeing and you said "hold I'm, I'm still peeing"
The guy in the American Flag bikini was telling the women he was disgusted at the amount of alcohol they weren't drinking. Then it got ridiculous.
I'm really sorry I gave you road head last night and made you drive over and break the sprinkler system.
Dude. I realize why I got sick. 8 shots three beers in an hour. Plus I ate an expired lunchable earlier.
I think I'm going to contact pbr and see if they'll sponsor our dreams
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Totally forgot we howled at the full moon last night... It's safe to say Tuesday Boozeday is my new favorite day of the week
Someone put a huge skyy vodka bottle in our washing machine. My roommate didn't see it and ran it. The washing machine split in two. #life
When did we go from stumbling drunk into an ER at 3am to dinner double dating?
Currently sifting through all the dick pics and nudes for a picture of my dad and I to post on social media for Father's Day...
While the cops were busting my party one of them said. O you have an Xbox? Do you play online? Whats your gamertag?....
She's dancing around licking a fork of nutella. She is not sober.
Randomize