I am so gay it hurts my loins. Going to see She's Just Not That Into You... again. Ohhh my goodness.
Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
Oh please, I could turn a Vienna Boys Choir concert into a shit show
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I never said you were fat, just too fat for ME
Found a phone last night. Hope "daddy" gets picture messages
So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
my new ipod has external speakers and a video camera...all i can think about is how much more convenient it would be for me to make a pretty decent sex tape
They had to restock the bar 3 times before midnight. There is a bridesmaid dress hanging in a tree outside.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Last time I stayed at my moms my fucking car got set on fire sooo maybe I should think this through.
Attention ladies coming to the party tonight! Tonight will be another chance to win the 5 bucks for getting my cousin hard. Bring your a-game, no one has been able to overcome the whiskey dick yet. Good luck.
Because guys aren't supposed to cry. Especially when it's over a dude singing a Christmas carol.
My pants zipper is stuck halfway down. I have to interview an intern later. This day is gonna be amazing,
So, I never imagined myself puking on the side of the road at 10:30 this morning to Lynyrd Skynyrd but here I am.
I tried to fuck you in my bathroom while my parents were in the next room. I am a clusterfuck of fun.
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