i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
thank god random hookups don't end with college. happy birthday, america.
I'm playing with the baby I just found in your kitchen
her last google searches are 'cheap african safari' and 'what does lion taste like'
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
And I think short bridesmaids dresses are the best idea especially for bathroom sex
The night went downhill when he lit her purse on fire and tried putting it out with vodka
He wanted me to blow him while he did curls and looked at himself in the mirror. Not sure if gay or ego maniac.
I have a fever. Last thing I need to do tonight is be elbow deep in old lady pussy.
So I've been spending my morning trying to figure out if there's a corealation between Wednesday margarita night and the boat that's now in my living room.
Buying a new pipe this morning, and setting up career plans this afternoon. It's called balance
shit i just threw up on a freshman
i don't know if i should laugh or feel bad..
nevermind it was a sophmore, laugh.
I'm hungover and in a fort. And I hate you.
So many questions
Nothin much, just sipping warm franzia from a plastic valentines wine glass while wrapped in my Mexican blanket listening to sappy country songs and mourning my lack of a love life. Hbu?
You have thirteen minutes to get here if you want to get back together. Otherwise I'm getting digits from the waitress.
Randomize
