Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
In other words, he somehow found his way to my apartment, wasted, and was naked on my new couch. Completely naked. It was too special to pass up.
fat chick, vomit on the dog, and three unidentifiable pills in my ear. all in the same ear. what the hell happened after the guests showed up?
you tried turning the bar into a spelling b competition last night and every time someone couldn't spell something you would make them chug.
I was seriously concerned she had died since she wasn't moving at all, but then I asked here where she was last night and her response was to hip thrust the air.
Turns out the average person our age has never run from the cops. Life: we're doing it right.
Got cut off last night cuz this chick had her hands down my shorts and was blatantly playing with my dick while I was trying to order. apparently that's "frowned upon"
His roommates are gone so we had sex in every room of the house and watched the wire. What have you done today?
Instead of asking him how many women he's slept with I just got straight to the point and asked how many Plan B pills he's purchased
One day I'll learn not to get drunk on a plane. Today is not that day.
"can you come pick me up from the ikea parking garage i think i slept here"
Humming the Indiana Jones theme song as my hand makes its way to his dick.
the voting booth dude cock blocked me or she woulda totally blown me in the voting booth.
Randomize
