i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
I wonder what it would be like to masturbate in space
look, i may have sacrified a 20% assignment for a sprite. this is what hangovers do to me.
I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
i perioded on his leg
on. his. leg.
I've got 15 minutes to eat dinner and drink a 40. Four years of college has all been training for this moment.
The future queen of Norway was pregnant with a druglord's baby when she met the prince. We still have hope.
then he compared my vagina to a dishwasher. A DISHWASHER?!
Its bad when you wake up with a penis drawn on your face. Its worse when you find out its traced..
Lets play a game called: how out of it are you today? Let me know if you can beat driving on the wrong side of the road twice and walking up two extra flights of stairs just because you weren't paying attention to what floor you are on....
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
Remember the golden rule, wine is for baths, and beer is for showers.
I saw a picture of a baby and it reminded me to take my birth control. Priorities
The next time you scream bombs away when you are inside me will be the last time you are inside me
So... Sorry we took your wife to the strip club last night... And sorry we bought her that lap dance... I think you're getting closer to your dream of a threesome, though.
Randomize
