Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
FYI-Owning a kitty significantly lowers your chances of ever seeing mine...
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
blah blah blah they called me an alcoholic because I threw my beer at a Jesus freak. it was for the best
So puking trix and chicken wings is horrible but atleast we got free drinks for taking the trash out at the bar we are really movin up in the world
Is there a reason there's a dick print on my seventh-story window?
As if finding out the man you just had sex with is married isn't bad enough, it gets so much more awkward when his wife comes in to comfort you...
Do the molecules within bourbon change when mixed with a cola to form a superior liquid treat?
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
Just remember, it's never too late to make a porno
Babe, Have you see my pants?
Try Jay street in Brooklyn.. that's where I last remember seeing them.
Eating pizza in the bath tub while watching a romantic comedy alone. I reached a new level of single.
Saw my doctor at the bar. He bought me a drink. I think he was looking up my medical record on his phone because he suddenly had to go. syphilis continues to fuck with my life
I just thought you should know that you should be proud of your dick. It's pretty much perfect. Just, ya know, by the way.
Randomize
