i just saw an asian skipping down the street and it made me think of you
one day I'm really going to regret not using the boners I got in planes and cars
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
I've carried my liver for over 24 years. If it can't carry me for the next 24 hours than it deserves to be damaged.
I just found a 2 minute video on my phone of you throwing up in a fake plant.
I don't really know how to explain this place...it's like I feel like I need an std just to fit in
Regardless of the amount of alcohol you may consume tonight - DON'T take anybody home
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
My brother slept till 4, bought a sword, got drunk and sharpened said sword. I went to corporate compliance training. Life is not fair.
I can't believe I forgot to wish you a happy 13 week-iversary of the time you raw-dogged a rando. Only two days late, so it still counts. And since your 14 weeks is coming up, you should know that at 14 weeks your baby can squint, frown, grimace, pee, and possibly suck his/her/their/zir thumb!
You continued to run around saying "free the nipple" while "taste testing" every liquor on the premises.
i tried giving myself a bikini wax.1. i hate you 2. i think i'm dying
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
No I'm not high but I did cry for over an hour tonight because I realized that they never made a sequel to "Under the Tuscan Sun" with Diane Lane.
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