I'm so excited for this wedding, I feel like a school girl about to get finger launched on the dance floor at the sadie hawkins dance
If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
Redeem this text for a blowjob
six shots in, he is hammered and doing stretches before each shot
Slugs feel like vagina... thought you would want to know
My new apartment is within walking distance of both the liquor store and the chinese buffet. This is either going to be my worst life choice ever or my best.
She sucked my dick when I had a concussion. It was the coolest feeling ever but the doctor said it was a bad idea. He's obviously gay.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I did not stop moving last night. If tequila gives me that extra push to have an active lifestyle, so be it.
I would have to gauge my vagina to make it fit.
Do any of you want to be on a three way call with me while this girl masturbates in 10 min? You can't talk
Just crossed the line from casual pregrame to public intoxication. Shotgunning in a bus shelter.
In a cab. Towels everywhere. Confused.
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
Using your ex girlfriend's little brother to pick up women at the a&p: priceless
You are free to stop by. I promise to keep my penis in my leather pants
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