What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
I understand Curling. That high.
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
It looks alright. The blow up doll is in the microwave, and she has forks in her ass
Cognac is not meant to be taken in shots. I just wanted you to know the desperation of last night.
she puked as i came inside her. that has to mean something.
I found this letter on my leg this morning "dear sober self- we are one body now. It's weird but get used to it because it already happened" who the fuck is lionman?
It's 9am. I'm four lines ahead of you already. Wake up.
did i send you the picture of me smiling with the magnum wrapper?
She's a freaking stalker dude, it's like having some kind of cartoon animal just following around everywhere
Ones vagina should not have the same slogan as a can of Pringles.
I said "sucks to suck" to a cop last night. We've been snapchatting.
Well just give me the address, I'll bring the bourbon. If they let that into mental institutions
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
He put a doughnut around his dick and I ate it. What can I say. It was a good fucking night.
Randomize
