We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
I'm pretty sure he's lost all respect for me. it probably happened somewhere around the time i had officially slept with every single one of his friends..
that's why you don't digest questionable powders from girls wearing tutus at a dirty club
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
Listen to my proposal.... I feed you crackers while I fuck you ever so gently.
i mean let's face it...the pregnant girl was really slowing us down.
STOP TELLING PEOPLE I PEED ON YOU
When I tell my children how I survived hurricane Sandy I'll probably leave out the threesome
Honestly I'm so excited to go to bed I feel as if I don't deserve to be in my early twenties.
How the fuck you gonna play love don't cost a thing in a strip club?
Must say, as a couple, she and I are thrilled that our pretend lesbianism has paid off.
So I was just like hi, I'm your roommate's gf. Please don't hate me. That would be rly inconvenient for you.
My brother is coming home and he is bringing a whole bunch of friends with him. I am making him a cake. What should i put on it?
"Open for business" or "I have condoms" would probably work
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